Tomorrow, we enter the beginning of week five of “social isolation”.
It’s funny, at the beginning of all of this, I had so many people ask me “how are you and Lennon coping?”. And I used to laugh whilst responding “we’re fine! It’s just normal life for us but no swimming lessons or brunch dates with friends”. But slowly as we’ve progressed further into iso life, I’ve begun to feel it.
This is actually where this blog idea came from. Last Sunday, I woke up both mentally and physically exhausted. I needed to verbally unload and I did so on a Mother’s group page on Facebook that I’m in. I wasn’t posting for advice or sympathy or people to say “you’re doing a good job”. I posted just to get things off my chest and I instantly felt lighter.
Here’s some of what I wrote-
“… Usually Lennon sees her dad one day per week. In normal life (pre isolation) he would have her most Saturday’s 9am-6pm.
Currently, he will visit Lennon at my house for a few hours. We might go for a walk together or he’ll just play with her at home.
So that means at the moment I am with her 24/7.
I understand that this would likely be the case for most parents whether they are single or a couple. But I don’t get to switch off. I don’t have anyone to debrief with at the end of the day. I don’t have anyone to settle her whilst I’m trying to cook dinner or get up to her during the night which is a new thing of 3-5x per night. And I’m fucking exhausted! Plus on top I have a dog who has tantrums if he’s not being fed ALL THE BLOODY TIME!
I was hoping to be returning to work in the coming weeks however I have now taken a further 6 months leave due to the nature of my work and the health risk I would be putting myself, Lennon and my mum (who’d be caring for Lennon overnight whilst I’m at work) in.
I’m not looking for advice or sympathy or anything like that because I’m not that kind of person.
I just needed a safe place to say how I’m feeling….”
Of course there were some lovely and kind responses from my fellow mums.
But the real surprise/s happened over the following days. I had beautiful friends drop meals, wine, flowers and cookies off at my door. I had other friends checking in on me and offers to help with Lennon. I felt guilty accepting such kind gestures because it is not in my nature and I’m usually the friend helping others. But you know what, I did and I am so grateful and appreciative.
So to my friends, THANK YOU and I LOVE YOU! You have no idea how much your love and support has helped over the last week.
This might be a time where we are required to physically distance from others, but that doesn’t mean that we are to socially distance ourselves. Pick up the phone, send a text, whatever it might be, check in with someone!
And to anyone reading this who is struggling, I feel you. Your feelings are valid. Your feelings are real. We might not be in the same boat, but we are all in a boat of our own at the moment. Have a chat with a loved one or post on social media, whatever you think might help. You might not be met with wine and flowers, but you’ll quite possibly feel better for just venting.
Love and light,
Amy ✨
Edit: Lennon spent four hours with her Dad (not at my house) this weekend which meant I had some much needed baby free time. I wrote this blog prior to this happening but in order to be honest and transparent, thought I should mention it here. I spent that time having an anxiety inducing visit to the supermarket (anyone else get that now?) followed by some gardening which is always good for the soul.
Just the 2 of us 